The Importance of Self-Care

What is the big deal about self-care? That is something a lot of people find themselves wondering after they get told to try it out, what will this do to help me? Why should I focus so much attention on myself? There are a lot of good reasons why you should do it, but before we talk about why you should we should probably discern what is happening before that. Like the fact that if you are like me and were constantly told you were attention seeking when you were younger then practicing self-care gives you anxiety. You feel selfish, maybe you have a friend who has it “harder than you”. You have kids that you need to look after first, you’re married and want to take care of your spouse first, you have dogs and need to make them a priority first. Gosh there are really so many reasons we can keep listing here to not focus on you. Let’s take a step back now and look at the big picture. First the friend who has it harder then you, this excuse makes light of your mental health, someone might have significant debt they are trying to fix or bad credit or they just got kicked out of their home maybe. These things might be bad, but deteriorating mental health, let’s think what that could bring on, like loss of life figuratively or literally. Deteriorating mental health isolates you, everyone has problems, but your mental health will always need to be important. Not because you are selfish, but because you AREN’T selfish. If you have good mental health, maybe you can help your friend out more. The other reasons, your kids, your animals, your spouse or gf/bf, these are more excuses making light of what you are dealing with every single day! Your dog and kids might not understand and as long as they are being fed, clothed, you know the necessities, then really there is time still. Time to make yourself focus on YOU. The world will not fall apart if you take 15 minutes to focus on something that makes you happy. Let me repeat that first part, the world will NOT fall apart. If you made an hourly time chart and filled it out with everything you do in a day you will learn a couple of things. One, there are quite a few hours in a day. Two, you probably have a few things on there that aren’t even necessary, or maybe it isn’t necessary to have certain activities take so long. By looking at that time chart you get to see how much time there really is.

Mon	Tues	Weds	Thurs	Fri	Sat	Sun
8 am
9 am
10 am
11 am
12 pm
1 pm
2 pm
3 pm
4 pm

This only goes until 4 but you see the idea, don’t you? This breakdown to represent the time you have to focus on others, and to focus on you, heck break it down to every 30 minutes if that helps you realize that there is time for YOU. That is actually a lot. If you are a parent and your infant takes up most of that time realize that a happy parent equals a happy baby. A happy parent can take better care of their kids, when you are miserable you can lash out, neglect kids, dogs, your significant other, your friends, and yourself. These are real and they happen, and if we are being honest, there are times when that baby is sleeping, and you can do something for you. When you make time to do something for you, after you get past that anxiety of “oh no I am only focusing on myself why should I be doing this when there are other important things” battle, you find yourself relaxing some. After that you find that you feel even a little bit better. After that you have this little energy ball, big or small, and you can focus on that friend, spouse, gf/bf, dog, horse, kid, etc. whatever and whoever it is that also requires your attention will have a sharper and brighter you. And that is who they need, they need you to be there with an ability to focus and energy to be of assistance. So, we now have why it is necessary to practice self-care. Well what kind of self-care should you be practicing? A little tip here is whatever makes you happy. Self-care is taking care of yourself, but not by doing everyday tasks. It’s using a hobby, or simple things like a shower or a bath. Me personally, I have things I enjoy and don’t really allow myself time for, I love to draw, tattoo and write. Writing these blogs is actually part of my self-care that I put in my mental health journal. I do not very often make time for this because of all the excuses listed earlier in this post, and it is a problem! Some other ideas for self-care could be:

- Journaling

- Crocheting

- Sun bathing

- Learning something new

- Playing a video game

- Reading a book

- Watching your favorite tv show or movie

- Going for a walk with your dog

It really is anything that requires you to think about what you want or need to do in that moment. Because of this self-care you practice you will find it easier to continue doing so. You might not find yourself as important as other people do, but when you make time for self-care (which we really all can do when we aren’t focusing on our excuses) you are essentially telling yourself that you matter. That you are worthy of the time it takes in a day to be ok. This is something powerful, this is you giving yourself a break from the tragic things your mental illness does to you on a daily basis. This is you taking back a portion of yourself. This is you making it and being strong.

Best,

~TKNott~