I hope you are all doing incredibly well! My last post was almost 2 whole months ago! This is due to a huge life event. We moved back to our hometown and the move was incredibly stressful.
Home is about a 4 hour drive where we lived in Belgrade. My truck broke down a few weeks before we left so we had one truck to pull over 2 campers, a work trailer, and another trailer. Plus an extra trip for the rest! It was a nightmare.
We just finished the last load about a week ago. And of course all of the organizing after a big move just sucks. Which brings us to now!
We had often spoke of whether we would return home or not, circumstances had made it so we had to. This all had me thinking about other things that can put your mental status into some kind of upheaval. And how we are supposed to deal with that in the best way.
In the event of a mental takedown because of life events we all have to deal with it in our own way. But I also have ideas for helping you get through it. Let’s talk it out.
Steps to Keep the Mental Upheaval in Check
Having changes in life are completely inevitable. This isn’t something many people like, but change is one of the most consistent things we have in this world. So this is the first step to getting through one of life’s curveballs on a mental status that I have found helpful.
· Accepting change as neither good or bad but as it is.
· Keeping perspective during change. We can’t always control what is happening but as you can read anywhere, you can control what you do about it. By keeping perspective you are essentially telling yourself it may not be as bad as it feels.
· Break it down as you can. Putting big milestones in life into smaller parts gives you a better sense of control on the situation. You can’t break the whole thing down, but you can break down the overwhelming thoughts surrounding the event.
· Find one good aspect of the event. Make it a focus and keep it close during the event, if you do this as the event unfolds you can start to find other aspects that are also good or at least not as bad as you thought. This also helps you keep perspective.
· Breathe deeply and often. A continuous rabbit hole of despair will ensure that it gets worse. I find that deep breathing helps with the second step of keeping perspective. It also helps you release tension and other negative energy.
· Accept how you feel and really feel it, acknowledge it, then let it go. It will keep trying to hang on but actively pushing it away after accepting the feelings says hey, I know this is hard and I accept it, but it does not have to be. And truly it doesn’t.
· Ask yourself why the event is happening. If it is bad, why did the thing happen? This isn’t an, “I should have done this or that” it’s a hey, how did this happen, could I have done anything, and then that becomes a learning experience and all of a sudden this thing happening has meaning for your future in a way you probably did not expect.
· Stay away from blame because often there isn’t someone at fault, it was just something that needed to happen in your life. This includes self blame because you absolutely can’t expect everything to be your fault.
· Take a step back emotionally. Get to the bottom of your feelings about it, try to see the big picture, and if you need to take a walk, do it!
Accepting the Outcome
Ultimately things will happen the way they happen for better or for worse. If you can make the outcome better absolutely do it.
However, if it is a situation you cannot control by any means you need to accept what will become of it. It could be hard or it could be easy. But either way it will be what it is.
Lack of control is a difficult thing for plenty of people, but if you try to control a situation that is out of your hands you will only cause yourself more harm and could even make it worse than it would have been if you had left well enough alone.
Final Thoughts
Things change everyday somewhere. Nothing on this Earth is permanent, but since this is the case it gives us the opportunity to deal with what lays ahead good or bad. The realization of how things change so often can be intense.
All we can do is try and make it better, and when we can’t sometimes the option is to just take a breath and let go.
Best Regards,
~TKNott~
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